have you ever given the key to your happiness to someone else that happens
when you feel you need somebody to change his or her behavior and then
you'll be a happier person in other words you are unhappy because this
person is not behaving in such an such manner if that is the thinking then your
happiness requires somebody to behave in a political of fashion the problem with
that is that person also has the key to making you unhappy now we need to change
this and that is what we are going to learn today on the fourth day of our
discussion on the art of happiness as a part of our happiness challenge consider
this scenario you had a morning 8:30 appointment with your boss and your
alarm failed to ring you woke up late and when you wanted to enter the
bathroom your our family member was already there and took excessive time
finally when you sat in the car and reach the highway you discovered there
was a traffic jam because of an accident and when you reached your boss's office
you were 45 minutes late your boss gave you a piece of his mind because of which
you became extremely miserable that day now whom would you blame for your misery
your boss who scolded you the cars which had an accident or your spouse who took
too much time in the washroom all bad stupid
alarm clock which did not ring on this day actually none of them are
responsible for your unhappiness why because your sentiments do not have to
hinge upon the external circumstances you can choose happiness no matter what
let me share with you a revealing story in regard to this which I love very much
Viktor Frankl was an Austrian Jew he was also practicing psychologist and had
written a paper that Sigmund Freud the senior psychologist and father of
psychoanalysis had gotten published however during the Second World War when
Hitler was rounding up the Jews in Europe and throwing them into
concentration camps Viktor Frankl along with his wife and daughters and brothers
was thrown into the worst of these camps the OSH West's camp there he was
separated from his wife and daughters and later on came to know that they had
died he describes the wretched conditions in that prison he says we
used to be forced to walk through the night without wearing clothes unsure
whether we would be alive the next day or not however in that situation he
discovered he had won freedom that nobody absolutely no one could take away
from him that was the freedom to choose to be
happy he decided to exert it and he would be
found smiling even laughing by the guards of the prison they were
astonished he became a source of inspiration to the prisoners and to the
guards themselves he decided to live through this ordeal and to announce to
the world his discovery finally when Germany lost and he was released from
prison he went back to Austria he wrote a book man's search for meaning in life
which was translated in 29 languages of the world
he began touring and lecturing around the world and received honorary
Doctorate degrees from scores of universities his personal experience
relates that difficult circumstances may come upon us but it does not mean that
we have to be miserable as the saying goes pain is inevitable misery is an
option so when we feel unhappy our natural tendency is to play the blame
game my unhappiness is because of so-and-so until that person changes how
can I be happy and in doing so we have placed the key of our happiness in the
hands of that person people who think in this manner they
feel desperate because they need external circumstances to change and
these situations are not necessarily in their hands however when we decide that
I am in charge of my own emotions when we decide that I need to stop playing
the blame game it is then that we take responsibility of our moods and then
slowly we start mastering our own mind if I am unhappy I alone am responsible
for it and I need to change my emotions that is when we start progressing on our
inner journey to becoming better and happier people in this art of happiness
series on the fourth day of the happiness challenge I hope that you have
already been started utilizing the tools that we had discussed yesterday
so the important homework for us to implement today then is to decide I will
not blame anybody for my unhappiness if I feel miserable I will have to learn to
choose better feelings better sentiments and better emotions for then I will be
on the fast track to becoming a happier person what do we need to do subsequent
to this we will discuss tomorrow on day five of this happiness
challenge
Không có nhận xét nào:
Đăng nhận xét